When you think of the word Mother, what comes to mind for you? Maybe it is someone who cares for you even when you aren’t at your best, comforts you when you are sad, protects you when you can’t stand on our own, guides you with their love and support without ever having to be asked. Someone that laughs because you are laughing, breaks a little inside when you are broken, or calls you, just because. These amazing “bonus moms” may not have given birth to us, yet they are definitely as worthy to be celebrated and honored.
Mother’s Day bears a different emotion in all of us. It’s a fantasy to think that it is only made up of the happy times, laughing, receiving cute homemade cards and breakfast in bed. Truth is, it can also be messy. For some friends, this is a really hard day filled with sadness and heartache. It may mean avoiding social media or the card aisle at the grocery store. There are those who are spending Mother’s Day with an ailing Mother who can’t recall their name, realizing this is may be their last time together. It can cause more pain and grief from the loss of a mother, or a child, wishing there was some way to hold them just one more time. It brings a disheartening feeling to those who never had the opportunity to have children of their own. And it is also a bitter reminder to many with a broken relationship and painful memories of a mother that treated them poorly and have worked so hard on how to move on. Whatever it feels like to you, don’t feel guilty about your feelings and go on pretending everything is alright. These are your feelings and if you need to cry, do it. If you need to scream, yell loud. If you need a shoulder, call your bonus mom. These are your feelings to have and becoming aware of them may actually bring you closer to understanding and the happiness you deserve.
We are all Mothers in our own way so in addition to celebrating the traditional Mother’s Day, let’s also give a huge shout-out to our “bonus-moms”. Those amazing people in our lives who are there for us unconditionally. They need you just as much as you need them. The best thing we can all do today is to build each other up and acknowledge our love for others with a big hug, a sweet text, much-needed pampering, and a gentle smile.